Back handed compliments......

[Marian Gray]

A lady joined an aerobics class made up mostly of older women like herself. At first, it was difficult to *follow all the steps, but after a few weeks she felt that she had a good grasp of the routines. One day, a fellow classmate stopped her to say, “I’ve been noticing you. You’re very coordinated.”
She couldn’t have been prouder. “Thank you,” She said.
“Yes,” she continued, “your shirt matches your pants, and your pants match your socks.”.


A student stopped a male professor in the hallway to say that she’d just learned that her mom had him as a teacher. Then, after looking me up and down, she asked, “Did you used to be good-looking?”


As a wannabe musician, I took advantage of an opportunity to play with a local recorder group. During a break in our first rehearsal, the woman sitting next to me, an accomplished musician, said, “You have a beautiful vibrato!” I was basking in the glow of her praise when she added, “You’re not supposed to.”


One morning shortly after we got married in our 60s, my husband and I were sitting on the bed putting on our socks and shoes. Out of the blue, he reached over and patted me on the knee, saying, “I am so glad we got married.”
He was being romantic, and I appreciated it. “Me, too,” I said.
He continued, “Do you have any idea how nice it is to open my dresser drawer and find my underwear and socks all folded nice and neat?


Somehow, a friend and I got on the subject of age, which led him to ask how old I was.
“Thirty-seven,” I said.
He cocked his head and asked, “Is that all?


The boss at the factory was a grizzled New Yorker with a management philosophy that harked back to the sweatshops of old. A shift without being cussed out multiple times was considered a win. But one day, after I spotted and corrected a problem with one of the machines, he offered me the highest compliment he could think of.
“Rich,” he said, “you’re stinking less at this job all the time.


Happy birthday! You don’t look 60, but I remember when you did!


From a reference letter written by my first boss: “Sarah is very lazy. When given a task she immediately figures out the easiest and quickest way to complete it. This tends to make her highly efficient.


Years ago, I was giving a presentation at the Pentagon in order to get funding for a project. When I finished, the general I was briefing smiled wryly and said, “You should sell used cars.” I don’t think he meant it in a good way.



My then-wife and I were going through a divorce when we sat together to watch a TV show. It was about a New York City transit cop, played by James Brolin, who was rescuing passengers trapped in a flooded subway. To my pleasant surprise, she said, “He’s only an actor. You’re trained to do that. Scout, Army, NYPD Rescue … You could *really save them, not him.”
It was a sweet moment that ended when she remarked, “Of course, he looks much better doing it

[Ivan Cloherty]

Real life story and a put down. When I was a widower and lived in a village, the local hostelry hire a luxury coach with tables, table lamps, nice furnishings etc, and we quaffed champagne on the way to Ladies Day at Ascot, we had won money on the way there and instead of sharing out we opted for the day in the Champagne Bar, Well there was a lovely young lady (mid forties) a couple of tables away who kept looking at me and smiling and of course the boys were saying go for it Ivan, believe it or not I was quite shy at the time, long time since I'd done any dating. Well to my surprise she gets up and walks over to me and the boys are nudging me, and she says in a lovely modulated voice 'Hello, my mum really fancies you' of course the boys thought it was hilarious

[happy daze john in oz]

Went to the local club to book a table for Saturday night in the Bistro.
Here is a copy of the new menu the lady on the desk said, it has the new Seniors menu included
No good to me I replied, I like real food..

[cappy]

Real life story and a put down. When I was a widower and lived in a village, the local hostelry hire a luxury coach with tables, table lamps, nice furnishings etc, and we quaffed champagne on the way to Ladies Day at Ascot, we had won money on the way there and instead of sharing out we opted for the day in the Champagne Bar, Well there was a lovely young lady (mid forties) a couple of tables away who kept looking at me and smiling and of course the boys were saying go for it Ivan, believe it or not I was quite shy at the time, long time since I'd done any dating. Well to my surprise she gets up and walks over to me and the boys are nudging me, and she says in a lovely modulated voice 'Hello, my mum really fancies you' of course the boys thought it was hilarious

jeez ivan ...any port in a storm comes to mind ....lol cappy

[Ivan Cloherty]

jeez ivan ...any port in a storm comes to mind ....lol cappy

Actually Cappy, she was quite tasty but had the same christian name as my late wife, and that just was too much to bear, did find out later that she was part of a 'break their fingers' family from Essex so counted my blessings

[happy daze john in oz]

Yes Ivan, the Richardson family, well known big enemy of those two loveable psychiatric homosexual killers.