master criminal in training.

[Marian Gray]

#8, Oh my word Johnny that made me laugh out loud

The other day was minding my youngest 3yr old granddaughter. She wanted to watch a film so I gave her the remote control to go through the trailers on Disney, told her to shout when she had made her choice and went off to make our lunch. Whilst in the kitchen the phone ran it was my son - her father. He asked if I had selected the new barbie film and clicked to pay as the £16.00 was about to be added to his credit card. Couldn't believe what I was hearing ran through to the wee one and she's making herself comfy to watch. Clicked it off and spoke to him so he managed to cancel. Could hardly get my head around what she had managed or the price of the film! Continued making the lunch and she asked 'grandma where's the kkk letter'. Not knowing what she was referring too followed her back through to find she had managed to locate the select page to type in her choice but she couldn't find the 'k letter' on the remote control to Cancel her spelling mistake!


Family favourite though with my sisters and I is 20yrs ago when my mum called from Australia whilst on holiday. We all had a quick natter and then sat down for tea with our dad. Blethering away I suddenly could hear my mums voice in the distance. We looked around to discover our 2yr niece under the tablecloth with her feet sticking out, lifted up the cloth and there she was with the phone talking gobbly gook. She had pressed redial button hence mum screaming from OZ,

[J Gowers]

The talk of cots reminds me of a story a friend told me, he had installed a talkback system basically it looked like two phones you put one in the living room and one in the babies room, and hung it on the wall out of its reach, so you could hear if he was sleeping or playing around. The toddler was about 3 at the time, so sitting in the living room they thought they would ask the toddler throught the system if he was OK. So they were saying into the mocrophone "Are you OK" there was no responce so the asked again only to hear the toddler saying in a loud voice "What do you want wall"

[Marian Gray]

#12, Another cracker

[Marian Gray]

My younger cousin around 4yrs at the time came running into his home crying. My aunt asked what was wrong and he managed to blurt out their next door neighbour was going to kill his feet..... Apparently elderly Mrs Patterson had been washing the shared stair well [Tenement building] and he had walked over it and she said she would 'shoot the boots' off him if he did it again.

[Des Taff Jenkins]

When our son was two years old my wife went in as he was crying, when she asked him what was wrong he said Rumble Robby was talking to him through the wall, My wife said next time you hear it call me , which he did, she then took him into the bathroom and showed him the water in the bath gurgling going down the drain.
Des

[Marian Gray]

My late father in law was a professional grey hound trainer. December early 1950's he and my mother in law Rita stopped off on the way to Shawfield to visit another trainer. His little daughter was home and Rita asked what she would like for Christmas and the wee soul replied 'a doll, if my daddy gets a turn'

[Tony Taylor]

When our son was two years old my wife went in as he was crying, when she asked him what was wrong he said Rumble Robby was talking to him through the wall, My wife said next time you hear it call me , which he did, she then took him into the bathroom and showed him the water in the bath gurgling going down the drain.
Des

Ha ha, Des, reminds me of my youngest grandson who was 4 at the time; pointing to some bottles on the kitchen bench he said "grandad, is that nice to drink?" Which one son? "the parrot oil" he says, pointing to a bottle with a colourful macaw on the label - Doorlys Rum