Laurel and Hardy Day

[Don Rafferty]

Cap'n, I think your premises are long overdue a full Health and Safety Audit. I've got me hard hat and hi-viz and on me way

[Captain Kong]

If I am still here, I am calling a Safety Meeting this afternoon at 2 pm.
She will be there, I will be giving the lecture. also I will be wearing my Hard Hat in case she batters me.
Cheers
Brian.

[cappy]

you better take a black box recorder with you....ps we can find you if lost

[John Gill]

Doubt that Cappy- even at 50 fathoms deep i doubt if Kong would want to be located, better there than Boltonistan.

[gray_marian]

#22, Don, When you are finished at Brian's could you pop up......I do all the DIY here, when the lights fuse in one room my hubby moves to another awaiting my return!

[Red Lead Ted]

Marian, I have the same problem with my dragon DO YOU KNOW !!!!!!!!!! She still has the 8 rolls of wallpaper and 10 litres of emulsion I bought her for xmas LAST YEAR. THE FULL SET OF PAINT BRUSHES I BOUGHT HER THIS YEAR !!!!!!!!!!!!! Still in the wrapper. That's gratitude for you. Terry.

[gray_marian]

#27, Terry my Darlin', If you had given me that as a Christmas present...........you would be wearing them

[vic mcclymont]

0950 Monday.
Its started again I am bleddy sick.
I was making a pot of tea, just now, SHE, just behind me opens the Dishwasher door, I turn around and fall over it, Skinned all the skin off my left shin bone, now bleeding, as I fell over it onto the deck, I am rolling about in agony, she is rolling about laughing. `I hope you havent broken the door on the washer `, SHE says.
Is there no end to this torment??
SHE will have to go.
later when it stops raining I have to change my front wheel on the car as it is an old tyre,
I am dreading it. What is going to happen next?
If I am still alive later will let you know.
Have a nice day.
Brian.

Brian,
With your luck,did you ever manage to complete a voyage, did the ship you were on make it port in piece (LOL)?
Vic

[cappy]

#22, Don, When you are finished at Brian's could you pop up......I do all the DIY here, when the lights fuse in one room my hubby moves to another awaiting my return!

####marion im sure one or twohere wold be happy to pop up

[Captain Kong]

Hi Vic.

These are hospitals I have been in during my seafaring career.

Lagos, and Port Harcourt, Nigeria. two broken legs and a broken arm, fell off the mast.
Cape Town, South Africa, with torn ligaments in the spine and neck.
East London. Eastern Cape, S.A. Drowned but resuscitated, my mate died.
Sydney. Australia, Dislocated right shoulder. Hit by an Albatross whilst on look out. it died.
Singapore, 6 inch nail right through my right foot.
Penang, not saying.
Al Khobar, Saudi Arabia. Crushed left leg, they wanted to amputate, No Way.
Mena al Ahmadi, had a tooth pulled.
Port Said, Egypt, Sceptic and swollen right knee.
Patras, Greece, Broken right thumb, fell down the steps in a brothel, that was all I got.
Curacao, West Indies., broken left leg, got run over on a fairground by the Waltzer. a few drinks previously caused it.
San Francisco, USA, torn ligaments in the back when a wire carried away.
Honolulu, Hawaii, Severe Pancriitus and gangrene gall bladder and Cholysistitus, 4 days to live.
Southampton, UK busted knee slipped down an oil tank and landed on a frame.
Brighton UK, Broken ankle jumping off the hatch and landed on a cleat in Newhaven..
Dreadnought Hospital, Greenwich. Two operations.
Liverpool Royal , broken ankle.
Leith/ Edinburgh, Sceptic thumb.
Rotterdam had a tooth pulled.
Durban , Had a tooth Pulled.
Bolton. Had Meningitis.
Bolton, Operation on torn Clavicular Ligaments and collar bone after being attacked by a bull elephant seal in the Antarctic.
Bolton again. I walked out the hospital after that op. and got run over by a car on the way home, back in the hospital 20 minutes later. for an operation on my knee,
There may be more but cannot remember all of them.
Also had a total of 120 stitches over the years.
I am almost bionic.
.
I think that is it. A world tour of Hospitals.
If you need any Safety Advice just consult me. I am an expert.
.
I had a Safety Meeting at 2pm today.
I taught HER a few things about Safety and on how to avoid accidents as I am an expert.
2.15pm, Safety meeting closed, too much laughter from HER,
I think I was wasting my time.
Some people never learn.
Have a nice day
Brian.