The Wonders of Navigation.

[john sutton]

Where are the happy ******s?





















































Where the ******s are not happy



They´re not happy in Gaza.

They're not happy in Egypt.

They're not happy in Libya.

They're not happy in Morocco.

They're not happy in Iran.

They're not happy in Iraq.

They're not happy in Yemen.

They're not happy in Afghanistan.

They're not happy in Pakistan.

They're not happy in Syria.

They're not happy in Lebanon.
They're not happy in Indonesia



So, where are they happy?



They're happy in Australia.

They're happy in Canada.

They're happy in England.

They're happy in France.

They're happy in Italy.

They're happy in Germany.

They're happy in Sweden.

They're happy in the USA.

They're happy in Norway.

They're happy in almost every country that is not Islamic!





And whom do they blame?










Not *****...Not their leadership... Not themselves...

THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN! And they want to change the countries they're happy in, to be like the countries they came from, where they were unhappy.

Try to find logic in that

john sutton

[John Arton]

Hi
Slightly different but.
I sailed with one Captain who had a German wife (ex. air hostess), who spoke little English, apparantley one of the children used to do the translation when things got difficult.
Anyway, one day he comes home on leave, puts his key in the door only to find it won't work. After a few attempts the door is opened by a complete male starnger, demanding to know why he is trying to get into his house. "Because I live here" says the Captain, wondering what the hell was going on.
"No you don't, I own this house" says the stranger.
The upshot of it all was his wife had somehow sold the house and moved elsewhere but for some unknown reason had either forgotten to tell him or the letter telling him had gone adrift.
Apparently it took him some time to find his new address.

rgds
Capt. John Arton (ret'd)

[Graham Payne]

The first principle of the sextant is,
"a light in a plane" (sod it ) Iv'e forgot the rest .
have to stay an AB now

[Don Rafferty]

The first principle of the sextant is,
"a light in a plane" (sod it ) Iv'e forgot the rest .
have to stay an AB now

One I've always (partly) remembered from Indie' - The principle of the mercurial barometer is the weight of a column of air, equal in diameter to that of a column of mercury.....................

[Graham Payne]

Mr John Sutton
you hit the nail right on the head there mate. Well said.

[Graham Payne]

Hi Don
same Captains lectures I suspect, was it from Captain George Washinton Irvin ?

[Don Rafferty]

Indeed it was the Captains lecture Graham, I've always felt we left that school with a lot more than was necessary to be a Deck or Galley Boy, but even if we didn't use all of the knowledge at the time, it was great to have it and proved useful in later life as well.

[Captain Kong]

Hi
Slightly different but.
I sailed with one Captain who had a German wife (ex. air hostess), who spoke little English, apparantley one of the children used to do the translation when things got difficult.
Anyway, one day he comes home on leave, puts his key in the door only to find it won't work. After a few attempts the door is opened by a complete male starnger, demanding to know why he is trying to get into his house. "Because I live here" says the Captain, wondering what the hell was going on.
"No you don't, I own this house" says the stranger.
The upshot of it all was his wife had somehow sold the house and moved elsewhere but for some unknown reason had either forgotten to tell him or the letter telling him had gone adrift.
Apparently it took him some time to find his new address.

rgds
Capt. John Arton (ret'd)

Hi John,
This happened to a shipmate I sailed with in 1957. He lived in the Isle of Man. After paying off in London after a six month trip to Oz, and having several bevies on the train to Liverpool, he caught the last IOM boat to Douglas, He arrived in the early hours, realising everyone would be asleep he let himself in quietly with his key, and crept upstairs and crashed onto his bed.
The screams were terrble from underneath him, there was a young teenage girl in his bed, A man ran into the room and battered him almost unconcious and the Police were soon there and dragged him out and locked him up. In the morning he was charged with breaking and entering and an attack on a young lady.
He had a terrible job trying to explain that he lived there, His parents had sold the house and moved while he was away , again he never had any mail informing him. It was eventually solved when his parents were contacted and he was released without charge. Just a couple of black eyes and bruises to show for it.
EE its good to be home.!
Cheers
Brian

[robpage]

Rob.
How did you know where I live.? spot on.

It is the only house in the area that does not smell like a tandoori

[Gordon Turnbull]

We have a guy in our Lodge who is in virtually every night for a couple of half and a half pints. Came in four or five years ago with a sat nav. Anyway, explanation was he had bought it to find his way home at night (no car). He lived about half a mile from the Lodge and been coming in for about 20 years. Bless him. Not sure if he got home any quicker. The Temptress was waiting for him so maybe he deliberately took some detours??????