Courtesy Pam Ayres...
I have a little Satnav, it sits there in my car
A satnav is a drivers friend, it tells you where you are.
I have a litle satnav, I"ve had it all my life
Its better than the normal ones, my satnav is my wife.
It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive
" Its 60 miles an hour" it says, " your doing 65".
It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake,
And tells me that its never ever, safe to overtake.
It tells me when a light is Red and when it goes to Green,
It seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.
It lists the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear
And taking this into account, it specifies my gear.
I'm sure no other driver, has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car , it still gives its advice.
It fills me up with counselling, each journeys pretty fraught
So why dont I exchange it and get a quiter sort.
Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, makes sure I'm properly fed
It washes my shirts and things, and keeps me warm in bed,
Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff, I only wish now and then , I could turn the bugger off John S