They walk among us

[Bill Cameron]

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the city council office to request the removal of the DEEr CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: Too many deer’s are being hit by the cars out here! I don’t think it’s a good place for them to be crossing anymore.


The pedestrian light on the crossing corner beeps when it’s safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine, she asked if I knew what the bleeper was for. I explained that it signals blind people that the light is red.
Appalled she responded, “what on earth are blind people doing driving!!, She is a government employee.

When my wife and I arrived at the car dealership to pick up our car after a service, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passengers side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. Hey I announced to the mechanic, it’s open! His reply, I know I already did that side.
STAY ALERT!!
They walk among us, and they breed and they vote

[Keith at Tregenna]

They walk among us, they vote, and they breed!!!

Thomas Cook Holidays listing some of their UK genuine complaints.

"I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local store in Indian villages does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

"It's lazy of the local shopkeepers to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."

"On my holiday to Goa in India , I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all."

"We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels."

"The beach was too sandy."

"We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as yellow but it was white."

"Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."

"No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled."

"There was no egg-slicer in the apartment."

"We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."

"The roads were uneven.."

"It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England . It took the Americans only three hours to get home."

"I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller."

"The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation'. We're trainee hairdressers -- will we be OK staying there?"

"There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners now live abroad."

"We had to queue outside with no air-conditioning."

"It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

"I was bitten by a mosquito. No-one said they could bite."

"My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."

[happy daze john in oz]

On our country roads there are signs such as cattle cross here, or injured animals call this number.

No kidding, I heard a guy here from UK on holiday say,

'How do the injured animals make the call'??

Quite simple really, they all have mobiles with them.