Todays Smile

[Doc Vernon]

Just a smile for Today Lads!

These Irish Jokes are always a laugh!
Cheers

Joke.jpg

[happy daze john in oz]

Two young lads having a pee on a bush when one turns to the other and says.

'Why are you peeing differently to me'?

Well I mam Jewish said the other lad,

'What difference does that make'

'Well I had a bit cut off the end'

'How old were you then'

'Five weeks'
'Did it hurt'

'Did it hurt, mate I could not walk for 18 months"

[j.sabourn]

#1 That same Englishman ,Scotsman and Irishman, the Irishman dies and at his wake the Englishman is very distressed and says he died and I owed him 20 quid, so takes out 20 pounds from his wallet and throws it in the
Coffin. The Welshman is also is crying and saying I Ken well I owed him 30 pounds as well so he too throws 30 pounds into the coffin , the Scotsman is greeting as well and says I too owed him money so he takes out his cheque book makes out a cheque for a hundred pounds throws it in the coffin , and takes out the Fifty pounds change and puts it in his wallet. JS

[Johnny Kieran]

Brilliant stuff boy's, keep it coming

[j.sabourn]

This bloke with not a too good vocabulary goes into this cafe, young waitress comes to the table to take his order, he looks at the menu and says I’ll have two pissoles with a serving of baked beans on the side.The young waitress is shocked and rushes to see the manager and says there’s a male customer out there being bad mouthed out there. Ok says the manager I’ll sort him out and goes and confronts the Customer.Now sir he says what do you want? All I want is what’s on the menu says the customer beans and two pissoles, give me that menu says the manager, ahh he says that’s not a P that’s supposed to be an R. Okay okay said the customer give me two Rsolles.,JS

[Tony Taylor]

My mother in law came to tea; why does your dog keep looking at me? she says.
I replied, " your're using his plate.