Is this you

[happy daze john in oz]

Questions and Answers from CARP Forum

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find
younger women who are interested in them?


A: Try a bookstore, under
Fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going
through menopause?


A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your
over-70 year-old husband?


A: Tell him you're
pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the
elderly wrinkles?


A: Take off your
glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet
and all those wrinkles on my face?


A: Go braless. It will usually pull them
out.

Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet
parking?


A: Valets don't forget where they park your
car

Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have
problems with short term memory storage?


A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it
is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?


A: Yes, but usually in the
afternoon.

Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye
glasses?


A: On their
foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus
year olds when they enter antique stores?


A: "Gosh, I remember
these!"

SMILE,
You've still got your sense of
humor, haven't you?

[Des Taff Jenkins]

I rang a taxi this morning, he asked where to, I said around town I want to find my car, he said have you looked in your garage,. He saved me a taxi fare.
Des