the world is full of wise people

[john sutton]

Only retired people will have enough time top read this right to the end

Keith HEWITT






--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Lot of British talent here and a few other's







ACCEPTING OLD AGE

Getting old is a fascinating thing. The older you get, the older you want to get.”

Rolling Stone Keith Richards



“Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.”

Will Rogers, American comedian and actor



GOLDEN YEARS

“We don’t grow older, we grow riper.”

Artist Pablo Picasso



“One of the best parts of growing older? You can flirt all you like since you’ve become harmless.”

Liz Smith, British actress



“The age of a woman doesn’t mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson, American writer



“As you grow old, you lose interest in sex, your friends drift away, and your children often ignore you. There are other advantages of course, but these are the outstanding ones.”

Richard Needham, Earl of Kilmorey, politician



“I’ve got cheekier with age. You can get away with murder when you’re 71 years old. People just think I’m a silly old fool.”

Comedian Bernard Manning



“One of the good things about getting older is you find you’re more interesting than most of the people you meet.”

Lee Marvin, American actor



“The whiter my hair becomes, the more ready people are to believe what I say.”

Philosopher Bertrand Russell



YOU KNOW YOU’RE GETTING OLD WHEN...

“There are many mysteries in old age but the greatest, surely, is this: in those adverts for walk-in bathtubs, why doesn’t all the water gush out when you get in?”

Alan Coren, writer



“Life’s tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late.”

Benjamin Franklin, American statesman



“Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.”Truman Capote, American writer

“Grandchildren don’t make a man feel old; it’s the knowledge that he’s married to a grandmother.”

G Norman Collie, political activist



“When I was young, I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old, I know it is.”

Oscar Wilde



LEARNING FROM EXPERIENCE

“I get to be a kid now because I wasn’t a kid when I was supposed to be one. But in some ways, I’m like an old woman – lived it, seen it, done it, been there, have the T-shirt.”

Actress Drew Barrymore



“Whenever I get down about life going by too quickly, what helps me is a little mantra that I repeat to myself: at least I’m not a fruit fly.”

Ray Romano, American comedian



“Just remember, once you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.”

Charles M Schulz, American cartoonist



“If I had my life to live over again, I’d make the same mistakes, only sooner.”

Actress Tallulah Bankhead



“The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.”

Boxer Muhammad Ali



“You don’t appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: stuff you pay good money for in later life.”

US comedian Emo Phillips



GROWING OLD GRACEFULLY

“Don’t retouch my wrinkles in the photograph. I would not want it to be thought that I had lived for all these years without having anything to show for it.”

The Queen Mother

“How foolish to think that one can ever slam the door in the face of age. Much wiser to be polite and gracious and ask him to lunch in advance.”

Actor and playwright Noel Coward

GRUMPY OLD GITS

“There is absolutely nothing to be said in favour of growing old. There ought to be legislation against it.”

Patrick Moore, astronomer



“There’s no law that decrees when not to whinge, but you reach a certain age – 80 seems about right – when you’re expected to manifest querulousness – the coffee’s too hot, the boiled egg’s too soft …”

Clement Freud, broadcaster



ELDERLY EXERCISE

“I am getting to an age when I can enjoy the last sport left. It is called hunting for your spectacles.”

Sir Edward Grey, politician



“Each year it grows harder to make ends meet – the ends I refer to are hands and feet.”

Richard Armour, American poet



“You can’t be as old as I am without waking up with a surprised look on your face every morning. ‘Holy Christ, what da you know – I’m still around!’ It’s absolutely amazing that I survived all the booze and smoking and the cars and the career.”

Paul Newman, actor



“I keep fit. Every morning, I do a hundred laps of an Olympic-sized swimming pool – in a small motor launch.”

Peter Cook, comedian



“If you rest, you rust.”

Helen Hayes, American actress



LOSING YOUR FACULTIES

“As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two …”

Norman Wisdom



“You know you’re getting old when a four-letter word for something pleasurable two people can do in bed together is R-E-A-D.”

Denis Norden



“I don’t feel 80. In fact I don’t feel anything until noon, then it’s time for my nap.”

Bob Hope, comedian



SECRETS OF A LONG LIFE

“You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.”

Woody Allen



“It’s a good idea to obey all the rules when you’re young just so you’ll have the strength to break them when you’re old.”

Mark Twain



“There is only one cure for grey. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.”

PG Wodehouse

and from me !..............

Only retired people will have enough time top read this right to the end Smiling face (black and white)

john sutton




• Old Git Wit, Quips and Quotes For The Young At Heart, by Richard Benson, is published by Summersdale and priced £9.99.

[Lou Barron]

Love it