Customs Dodges

[Stuart Henderson]

Loading in Long Beach the american shippers always gave us loads of free citrus without us asking.I suppose it kept us out of the cargo as if.............

Remember in the1950s onthe Oporto run with GSNC the port wine shippers used to put a small keg of port wine in the crew mess after loading to keep the lads out of the cargo. On a previous trip someone with a wood drill had entered the hold and drilled into one of the HUGE port barrels/kegs. Apparently disturbed in course of broaching had left hole open and running and many hundreds of pounds worth of port went into the bilges. One thing I learnt in those days after being delayed docking because of fog at Southend DONT MIX PORT with pints of McEwans bitter,never did get home that night ended up under a tree in Richmond park.
Stua\rt

[Jim Brady]

I joined a Lamport & Holt banana boat to work by as galley boy,I was on the quay as it docked.This was my first cargo boat after having served 12 months on the Empress Boats.The customs were everywhere.After it all died down and the customs left,on the end of the stove was a large fish kettle all frothy on top.What the cook had done was put some fish in it boiled it up the fish all broke up which caused all the froth on top.
he put the fish kettle on the end of the stove off the heat.He took about 6 bottles of rum out of it,then emptied the tin of custard powder out what was in there I dont know
Regards.
Jim.B.

[Captain Kong]

I was on the EGYPTIAN in 1953 We loaded a barrel in Famagusta it was for trans shipment to Shanghai with Blue Funnel., it was in No 4 Hatch. someone said there was a barrel of alcohol in there so it was tapped and mixed with BOT Lime juice didnt taste too bad and got to taste better the more you drank.
We docked in Liverpool the Mate came down to the mess. "Who`s been tapping the barrel, " "Didnt know there was a barrel we all said.
"Well that barrel contains a dead China man who is on his way back to China to be buried with his ancesters."
All the crowd were nearly sick, serves you right you lot he said.
That was the way they shipped them home in the days before long haul flights.
Never tapped a barrel since.

[Alan Ward]

Came back fro Japan with a load of good Sony stereo gear,tuner/amp,player and two big speakers.Told Customs that was no duty on it as it was going with me on my next trip.They reluctantly accepted that but as I was walking away on said quietly to me`Nice watch`an Omega I had bought at Botlek in Rotterdam trips before.

[Phil Crawley]

Alongside Plantation wharf in the Wellington Star loading whisky there was a tramp dossing in the rec' room and getting his eats from the crew galley, this scruffy unshaven individual was always about bumming fags and anything else that was on the go, one night a Stornoway AB asked him, if you really are a tramp how come you always have such highly polished shoes, the "tramp" just walked down the gangway, the next day he was aboard in a two ringers uniform of HM customs, pretty sly.
Phil Crawley.

[Bill Cameron]

Drat, the Statute of Llimitations have all run out on these Smuggling crimes ....or have they?
As an ex seafarer turned Customs Officer I could have a field day tracking down these stories, I suspect many should be in the Virtual Ship forum, under the heading "Tall Stories"
Beware the Rummage squads thes days, they are not the sympathetic Customs Men now, they are the Borders Control Agency, manned by not only former HMC&E staff but Immigration, and the really bad ones, the former Inland Revenue staff. Revenue & Customs are not the people you want to cross these days.

[Captain Kong]

If these new fellows are so good, then why in the old days it was so difficult to get one packet of ciggies out and today they are bringing in drugs by the TON and not only smuggling Drugs by the TON but smuggling people in as well and getting away with it. why is this happening now.

[Michael Lawrence]

Well said Kong. They would rather bully a refugee than mix it with the evil B******s.

[Bill Cameron]

Simples Captain Kong, staff cuts started by Maggie the Hatchet Thatcher, new type of targetting, the old Rummage 3 ringer is a dinasoaur in todays detection system, all intelligence based now. Also NO Rummage crews as you knew them. They became FAST's Flexible Anti Smuggling Teams, they worked as the teams had the knowledge of their working area. Sadly the bean counters once more saw that as a expensive way of working, and now there are no Customs men in docks as we knew them, they only now act on Intell passed on by the other agencies
And back in my day, if you managed to get 200 ciggies and a bottle past the customs Man, you thought you had done well, Now, well what can I say, drugs, and whatever, never hear of in my day!!!

[Captain Kong]

Hi Bill I realise that Maggie did a lot of cuts but Brown and his cohorts had 13 years to put things right again.
Every Polly always blames the previous administration no matter how long they have been in Power.