Virtual Ship

[Dennis McGuckin]

John,Think this vessel was well overdue for a refit. Is there any way we can get one for the crew?
Thanks' for the currant cutter, something I have always lusted after[among other things].Didn't think sand blasting could move those tab nabs. Must make a note to add more cement to the recipe.
How about a navigate of the globe trip. We could stop in at all home ports of the crew. They would then show us a good time at their locals while, of course, paying for all the booze. Could start in Vancouver. Sorry I wont be there to treat you as I am off to California next week. However, just mention my name, put the booze on my tab and you will be treated right[oh yeah] I can rejoin in LA.
Just a thought.
Den.

[Mick O'Brien]

Hi lads the mad ones back. wots up with this ship have we run aground????????.
And just been down the bond locker the dam things empty SACK THE GROSER,think thats how its spelt,and the last time isaw queenie she/he had the gally rat in her/his sights.................poor boy.
and the old mans lost the plot (who is the old man by the way) Den we like your tab nabs just the way they are.
And have i gone compleatly gaga all answers to my email addy.
wibble wobble.

mick ob'brien (mad mick)

ps hope to not here from you all never.

[happy daze john in oz]

Now Mick I have to tell you that was no rat, that was Taffy one eye's undies on the run. He was ashore having a beer when one of the locals asked what he did for a crust, he told them he left his undies on for a month. Ever since the welsh witches cleaned the cauldron he has had no where to do his dhobi. No stores as Vernon the store keeper sold every thing to buy ginger beer, but I have heard a whisper he is taking up deep diving off the African coast, no not muff diving, rather silver diving what ever that is? The skipper has taken Kes B Ann ashore to buy a new pair of trousers. The waist band shrank on the last pair.

[Michael Lawrence]

Hey up lads. Has anyone seen my skis which I purchased at a boot sale for the extortionate price of £1-00 and has any one got a pair of boots I can borrow?
I've been beavering away in the depths of the galley peeling spuds and carrots and chopping onions for Den and Terry to make the old sea pie. (And I mean OLD).
See the Taffia is revolting again but I've always thought them revolting(please don't tell W.R.). As long as you supply them with a cauldron and a few pints of Felinfoel (translated as 'feeling foul') they'll be O.K..
Was going to drop in on Den when he went for R.R. in Vancouver,but see he's doing a runner to Califonia again. Still maybe he'll lend me his boots if he's not using 'em. If not I'll have to get a couple of large tabnabs and carve a pair out of those. By the way Den and Terry I've had complaints from Egypt and China that the latest lot of Br--- Tanabs you sent them had no molasses in. Come on lads keep up or we'll lose the contract. I've arranged for a couple more mixers (industrial ones concrete use of) to be put aboard to make your lives easier and hopefully the tabnabs tastier. Must sign off as looking for a pair of longjohns to wear under my salopets. Mike

[Dennis McGuckin]

Mike mate, Sorry I am giving all my ski gear to son in law. Also all tune up and hot wax stuff.
No its not the Bekini type hot wax, before Les B Ann gets excited.
I expect you to keep your end up [so to speak] in the Galley during my short trip ashore.
Keep a close watch on those Welsh witches, and most of all look after my supply of rum extract.
Also guard the tab nab recipe with your life, or virginity, which ever comes first.
Will rejoin the ship in a week or so, if and when Albert can find his way to LA.
Den.

[Geoff Anderson]

I dont know , spend two weeks in the fog locker and when you come out we get slanged off for messing about with our cauldron , nicking Dens Tab nabs and having month old skid marks in your daks, well there only two weeks old and as they dont yet stick to the bulkheads , when i thrown them , they will do for another week a least. I see our young galleyboy is off on the Piste again, lets hope he has learnt to ski properly as last year he ended up 6 ft in front of the skis, causing some type of injury to himself, i think he landed on his wallet OUCH. And Dens off south for the tequila sunrise, lets hope he brings back some for us this time , instead off supping it all himself.
Taffy 1eye

[happy daze john in oz]

The skis, the skis, last seen at the stern of the ship. Big Mick decided to try water sking but had no ropes suitable. He was last seen using panty hose he stole from queenie to use for the job. Les B Ann was seen whipping the skipper to make the ship go fast enough for Mick to ski but it would appear the skipper was enjoying it telling Les B Ann 'harder' Den thought he was talking about the tab nabs so left them in the oven for an extra half hour. Alf is trying to steer between two bouys, or was that boys, so that queenie and Mick could both get it in line. The Welsh witches were banging on, or was that off, on the cauldron to encourage them. Vernon was busy trying to make cucumber sandwiches but queenie saw the cucumber first so sorry lads it will be bread and scrape again to night.

[Geoff Anderson]

Ill stick to the bread and scrape thank you , as i cant stand warm cucumber. Yuck. I suppose the savloy sausages are off the menu too, and no i dont need to know who,s been after them!.

[Dennis McGuckin]

So where is the ship?I am now in California and been down to the docks in LA, but no sign of you guys.
Hope I am not DBS again?
Den.

[Geoff Anderson]

Hi Den ,
Im still here, but it looks like the rest of the crew have legged it!!.Dont ask me where we are as ive havent got a clue, ive found Vernons stash of plonk and been in the fog locker ever since . This is the best workingby ive ever had Hic
I hope DBS dosnt stand for , drunk, broke and septic???. Arr well back to the fog locker Cheers Vernon HIC HIC.
taffy with one eye crossed.