Virtual Ship

[Michael Lawrence]

Hi Michael.
Dont know if you recived one of my messages,Im
having a lot of trouble getting in touch with people.
Im interested in your "Virtual Ship",let me have
all details,and as I said in my other message,
"any chance of an adavance",Ill have to purchase
some tropical gear ??

Dave Williams(R583900)

Davy Boy. Give us blokes time to answer your queries we don't all have secretaries like wot you 'ave. You listen to your Uncle Vernon and your Uncle Dazy and you wont go far wrong. You wont go right but you wont go maybe anywhere. Theres some more of your tribe doing a brew up on the fore deck so watch you don't fall in the cauldron. Mike

[Dennis McGuckin]

We're in Malta or least wise thats according to the Old Man's 1969 Esso map. I know its Malta coz I was ashore earlier and the motorists and bus drivers were driving down the centre of the road, which makes it a bit difficult where theres a central reservation. Anyway it shook me up somewhat so went into a bar for a drink and was sold a tot of 'Eight Bells' so has Den been ashore before me and flog some of our 'gold' to a local I ask myself? Or have the Witches been doing a bit of magic and telepoting it ashore and will we find it in every bar between here and Ma Gleesons? Anyway if you care to join me I'll buy you a drink, Tahts if you lot can get down the gangway. We're not going anywhere as Percol the eng., has come ashore with the key to the motor (it looks like a big spanner to me) Someone have aq word with Dazy as he thinks we'll still in the 'Bay'. Mike ( Chief Galley Boy Extraordinary)

What's with the 'Extaordinary' bit? Havent seen you peel a bloody spud since you came aboard. Hanging around the 8 bell brew is your main pass time. Would log you, but not much point as none of us are being paid. Or is it just me?
Den.

[Dennis McGuckin]

We're in Malta or least wise thats according to the Old Man's 1969 Esso map. I know its Malta coz I was ashore earlier and the motorists and bus drivers were driving down the centre of the road, which makes it a bit difficult where theres a central reservation. Anyway it shook me up somewhat so went into a bar for a drink and was sold a tot of 'Eight Bells' so has Den been ashore before me and flog some of our 'gold' to a local I ask myself? Or have the Witches been doing a bit of magic and telepoting it ashore and will we find it in every bar between here and Ma Gleesons? Anyway if you care to join me I'll buy you a drink, Tahts if you lot can get down the gangway. We're not going anywhere as Percol the eng., has come ashore with the key to the motor (it looks like a big spanner to me) Someone have aq word with Dazy as he thinks we'll still in the 'Bay'. Mike ( Chief Galley Boy Extraordinary)

Far be it from me to flog ships stores[cough-cough]
Who remembers scrubing their jeans on deck with soft soap and costic to make them look worn?
Den.

[happy daze john in oz]

I thinks we still in the Bay cos for the last four weeks I have been down below decks trying to keep an eye on the still, and the still is stll there. But all the five bells we were making has gone, evaporated maybe hic, now where did you say we were............????????????????????

[David Williams]

Hi Michael.
Still dont know what the words on the
sign on your Avatar say???


Dave Williams(R583900)

[Gulliver]

Yo! H(acting( Cap'n Mike L. Now how did ye do that?......
You've actually left that Medway port(codenamed Effnose)..and now you're in Grand Harbour,Malta??

And picked up Computer Operator(ex-Writer)Daishop Williams mid-Biscay-oh,yes that would be easy,especially him wearing flip-flops and thong,carrying a kitbag full of Leeks.Well me flabber is truly gasted!

Well,ye've sailed without me then.Hoho...leaving me and my trusty new-fangled female cadet(that be Ms.Les B.Anne to you,shipmates,--drowning our sorrows in 'Ye Olde Faggott & Firkin' on Chatham quayside.
Ar--tis 8 Bells for us again. Down the Hatch--and Spankers and Futtocks to us All!
Good Luck to Ye All says Me(and a Victory 'V' from she)

Gull.

[Geoff Anderson]

Hi All.
Well isnt it strange that we got to Malta,All on our own WHO needs hofficers , leave it to the man used to doing the job!!!.
Hey you seen that cadet that the skippers knocking around with, I hope nobody ever turns on the lights in the faggot & firkin, COR she is ugly, she could scare paint off a bulkhead. HERE have a look?????
taffy 1eye

[Michael Lawrence]

Hi Michael.
Still dont know what the words on the
sign on your Avatar say???


Dave Williams(R583900)

Dai Bach. Are you pulling my plonker the sign say's 'Danger Mine Shaft'. It's between Holywell Bay and Perranporth on the Northwest coast of Cornwall. Keep in touch Matey. Extraordinary Galley Boy

[Michael Lawrence]

Have i been delivering tea every day to some bloke and sheila in your cabin who isn't you or Less B Anne? Coz he's got a BIG ESSO 69 road atlas and it's covered in scrambled egg and curry stains with a blob of 'Scouse' in the right hand corner. Me I'm going back to the galley to Den who compared to you lot on the bridge is a nice sfe bet. Mike

[Gulliver]

Have i been delivering tea every day to some bloke and sheila in your cabin who isn't you or Less B Anne? Coz he's got a BIG ESSO 69 road atlas and it's covered in scrambled egg and curry stains with a blob of 'Scouse' in the right hand corner. Me I'm going back to the galley to Den who compared to you lot on the bridge is a nice sfe bet. Mike

Listen here,Mister G.B.E.(Galley Boy Extraordinaire,3rd class), Lawrence(a mere 'potologist' as you infer), are you saying I'm not aboard old m'v'Virtuality' here. My Esso road Map(1958) now duly corrected to 1st April 1970!!-courtesy of my new-fangled femaleCadet Les B.Anne got us here safely? didn't it?
And that lump of 'scouse' on the left side came in real handy-like--it was the Rock of Gibraltar,lads--that's how we turned to Port!
So what -I've been nobbled,I'm still aboard this stinking collander (trapped in me closet) of a vessel with you thankless lot.

Bet that bluddy Chief Hofficer will sink a tug or two with his anchor 'ere long.
Well,Les B.Anne's acting Skipper for now,and 'sinking' has got me tongue hanging out a league or two.
8 Bells Ar! Tis me medication/ sedation.
Happy Christmas to us here in Malta,Walter!
Gulliver
P.S. You've got to be following this thread to understand it(we don't! ) We're not mad-just a crew of ex-seafarers in the 'Nelson' Wing of 'shady Pines Rest Home!-) or are we?