Virtual Ship

[Michael Lawrence]

Will the crew of this ship kindly stop playing balls er bowls with Den's and Terry's tabnabs. The state of the sides look like a wild night at the 'West End Club' after Taffy X has smelt the barmaids apron. TaffyX will now enlightened you, who do not come from 'Heaven' what and where the 'West End Club' is There's more 'oles in this ship than I ever found at 'Joe Shell's ' store in Curacao. Joe Amigo no doubt know's of it if he's not been there, (the West End Club' that is )
We are still trying to get the riggers to finish this new coaster of ours(bungalow) and still have most of the gear strewn(good word that) in the after messroom(read sunhouse) and the rest we've put aloft in the loft. W.R. is handling things better than I am, but I put that down to the amount of tombola she's playing, not winning just playing. I've had to harness in my drinking neck until the Doc Rachel (lovely girl) gives me the go ahead.
Don't tell the cooks (thats a joke) but I've booked a caravan for Taffy (my Taffy not X or old 'un) and I at Polperro in Sept.,. Will keep a look out (more than what George is doing)to see if any out of work fishermen might like to join us. By the way welcome to all newcomers, you'l enjoy this ship ,not alot but.
Take care you bunch of horny handed sailors even the funny kind. Mike

[Gulliver]

Well,Alfiepops,you've been awfully slow in refuting those claims about you-know what.
Terry(Terri? and I think thou protesteth too much!

Fly the flag,love,fly the flag!

Gull(twiddling his ever- so -macho moustache)

[Dennis McGuckin]

Hi DEN.
Have a good few days fishing, Im still waiting for my salmon you promised me last time you went out.!
So if one turns up with my name on it, dont throw it back. Dont like fishhead soup cant stand all those EYES looking at me.
Have a good time DEN And if the fish dont bite you can always have a few bevies .
Taffy 1eye

Hi x Taffy 2,
Had one with my last name on it, but it got the first name wrong. FRAN.
Anyway mate, it's yours if you can get it off her!!!
I did have a few bevies. At least I can do that right.
Den.

[Doc Vernon]

Hi Den,
Very appropriate name for that Boat mate! Trophy indeed!
Loks lovely (the Fish ythat is hah)
Only kidding,as i really dont go much on Fish! Except certain kinds that is!
Keep it for al the Lads on this Virtual Ship Den,i think they are all starving by now! haha!
I cant show my Face here as i have been neglecting the Crew of late,and i fear they may throw me in the Brig! LOL!
Will have to try and get back on track soon!
Just been too busy of late! Sorry Lads!

How about some nice smoked Snoek again Den haha!
Yummy i can still smell that lovely Aroma! And what about yours too Den,!
Al that setup you have there at home! My Mouth Waters
Cheers

[Geoff Anderson]

Hi All.
Vernon my old mate its nice to see you, come closer. We,ve been looking for a Brave gallant volunteer( IDIOT)For a very special job. its either that or we throw you in the brig, with the very randy Queenie and throw away the keys. Its a very simple job and wont take a very busy man like yourself a moment thats all . Just go up to the heads and light a match. As we need those toilets cleared , as everybody is walking around like penguins and cross eyed. taffy 1eye

[Dennis McGuckin]

Vernon, Fran condescended to let me have a piece [fish that is] for supper. Delicious.
Will be smoking another batch soon, so will treat the boys when it's done.
Nice to have you back aboard. Know you have been busy with the site and other things. We need you to help keep this motley crew in line.
Time for me to get back to the galley and see how Terry has managed. Bet that lazy galley boy is adrift again.
Den.

[happy daze john in oz]

Den mate we have all smoked some odd stuff over time, but FISH? Does it make the fag papers wet?Now we have another problem, if we blow the sh-1-t house up then all the tab nab bungs that are keeping the sea out will also go, then we will be back to a very air conditioned ship! I think we should invite queenie down on the heads, as that is one of her specialities, and see what she can do. Maybe she could take a spoke out of Alf's wheel and poke it about a bit?

[Geoff Anderson]

Hi John , i dont mind what we do, but please do it quick. i dont know how much longer i can hold on!

Boooooooooom !!!!. Looks like old Queenie took your advice, but instead of using a spoke off alfs wheel. She used that battery operated female stimulation device and there was a short, which caused a spark and whooooosh we have the worlds first **** house in space complete with a queen as an attendant. That will p off the yanks a bit, maybe we can sell then the recipe.?
taffy 1eye

[Dennis McGuckin]

Hi Daze, Best to use a pipe. Eliminates the 'soggy paper' syndrome.
Den.

[Mick O'Brien]

Hey lads seeing as the bogs are out of order, and there are a lot of xeyed and xlegged crew on this ship.
I can help out (at a price). I got 12 cases of empty beer bottles here going rate is £1 per bott (no credit).

madmick