The wit of shipboard Queens

[gray_marian]

#53, 'How did you know'....Hi Herb, Not much escapes the women on here! I read it on your profile.....Pity, I would have liked to have read it. Toodle pip, Marian

[happy daze john in oz]

Herb, thta was most unfortunate for you. On the Windsor all catering crew were divided into first and tourist class. The part of the working alleyway where the firts class 'girls' lived was we were informed by the peak steward a bit like a brothel. Between the various perfume smells, the body odour and bodies going back and forth it was something you would rather read about then experience.

[Bob Petty]

And I thought you rugged Welshman liked a bit of rough.

[John Arton]

Doing night rounds at 0200 with the Master at Arms on the Empress of Canada, going down the alleyway where all the catering crew lived, there was a racket coming from one of the cabins with high pitched "female" voices mixed amongst all the racket. The MA reckoned that the cabin inhabitants were having a party and had some female passengers in there (strictly forbidden in C.P. for anyone below the rank of Master, to have any passengers, female or male, in your cabin). So be banged on the door and marched in demanding that they stop the party and that any passenger leave, I was right behind him (very brave I was). Imagine his (and mine) surprise to find that the party consisted of all the cabins occupants engaged in a "daisy chain" (will leave the definition up to your own imagination, suffice to say there were no females involved in that orgy). Without any interruption to the action we were both asked if we wanted to join in the action "dearies". Boy the pair of us could not get out of there quick enough and scarpered away down the alleyway with the catcalls ringing in our ears. For the next couple of meals in our 1st class dining area I was getting "looks" from our waiter and innuendos from him when he was serving our table. Had eventually had to explain to the rest of the guys what the waiter was implying with his looks and innuendo, which caused me further embarrassment with all the ribald comments from my fellow table mates. Almost scarred me for life and I still shudder when I think about what I saw that night!
rgds
JA

[cappy]

##aha john .....the weak link in the chain .....lol cappy

[cappy]

a mate of mine from shields now lives in surrey we visit them and they come and see us in his garden is a sighn as follows .........WHEREVER YOU ARE IN A GARDEN THERE IS NEVER A FAIRY FAR AWAY always causes ribald comments...regards cappy

[Des Taff Jenkins]

Hi Bob.
I wish I had known that when you were at Westmead, I might come up and visit ,in Qeens--land.
Cheers Mate Des

[john walker]

When I first posted this thread I did not expect the response it received, for nearly a year it has had some funny and amusing posts. To keep it going here is another amusing incident that I remember from the 'Princess of Prussia ' Which is a pub that was nearest to the pool in Prescott street London in the warm summer of I think 1976. There were quite a few characters that still lived around that area and used the pub, one of them was an old queen called Dixie who had spent a bit of time in the army and quite a lot of time in the M.N. due to age he was now working as a cook/steward on the sludge boats out of Woolwich. A few of us who were on leave had arranged to meet up for a drink I was stood at the bar talking to Dixie when two A/B's came in. One of them who was quite muscular and wearing a sort of gym vest and shorts with a good suntan came to the bar to order and stood right next to Dixie the response from Dixie was a lot of oohing and aahing and preening. The young A/B looked at him with some embarrassment and said 'Are you a queer or what' Dixie's response ' I could be persuaded '

[cappy]

in Aden there was a seamans club international .....swimming pool fresh milk steaks and a good supply of beers etc ....there was a swedish crew in the same time as us .....we were a british tanker .....amongst the swedes was what can only be described as a queen of queens lapping up the attentionof two tanker crews.......later in the night someone saw the queen and two sailors disappear out side to where there was a football pitch ......the word was paassed round and after a short time ......no pun intended ....the floodlights for the pitch were put on the site was mind boggling to say the least ...the queen while orally seeing to one sailor.....was being what can only be described as being steered from the rear by the other sailor in full floodlight fashion ....the cheers and jeers where very loud to say the least ...but in true sailor fashion nothing was going to stop the goings on cheered on by two ships crews..............the things we saw in our youth at sea ......regards cappy

[j.sabourn]

Did they get married in later life, or was it just a fling, and was the odd one out best man, and was bigamy committed later. JS