shi painting etc

In the early seventies the boffins at Cayzer House decided that chipping and painting would be replaced by shot blasting.
This caused unforeseen problems:-
1: Continual usage for 12 huours a day increased maintenance on the ships air comprEssors.
2: The main engine vent fans were located above the bridge.
The first time the deck crew tried the shotblasting it was aresounding success, the steel plate was nice and shiny. Unfortunately the forgot to prime the steel plate, result next morning a thin coat of roast had appeared overnight, so the whole thing had to be repeated.
The main engine vent fans sucked in the crap, result ER was coated in dust. The dust and crap damaged the bearings on one of the main fridge comprEssors.
Next trip the boffins decided, despite all the problems that the experiment was an overwhelming success.
In order to alleviate main compressor problems the company bought a portable compressor which was lashed to the deck.
Deck rust removal productivity improved, ER cleaning took a nose dive.
Vic

Hi shipmates, small boats are a joy, it has cost me nothing ? how I knew a few engine fixers, who had loads of customers all rich boat owners, all size of craft, I just help them out now and again, free drinks in the club, and many times around the bay to check out the engine, and a few bob in my pocket {tax free} never payed a penny for moorings or paint or anything else. great fun !! a cheap hobby.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Louis the Amigo

Hi shipmates, small boats are a joy, it has cost me nothing ? how I knew a few engine fixers, who had loads of customers all rich boat owners, all size of craft, I just help them out now and again, free drinks in the club, and many times around the bay to check out the engine, and a few bob in my pocket {tax free} never payed a penny for moorings or paint or anything else. great fun !! a cheap hobby.

---

Well done Louis, a true capitalist enterprise, expect a knock on the door anytime now from H M Customs and Excise for back taxes who regularily monitor these sites

More worried about an e.mail received, the sender is known to be both serious and a joker.

Worry or laugh: Your choice -

To all retired Military Personnel.

You may soon receive the letter below from the MOD. Time to dig out your old kit......

NOTIFICATION OF COMPULSORY ENLISTMENT.....

Under the Emergency Powers Act (1939) as amended by the Defence Act (1997, you are hereby notified that you are required to place yourself on standby for possible compulsory military service in the British/American Conflict with North Korea.

You may shortly be ordered to depart for Japan where you will join either the 3rd Wing of the 22nd Tactical Joint Operations Airborne Group or The Imperial Japanese Suicidal Conscripts Flight.

The Regulars are too busy and short staffed to be there themselves.

Due to the recent rundown of the Navy and the refusal of P&O to lend us any of their liners, because of the deplorable state in which they were returned after the Falklands adventure, it will be necessary for you to make your own way to the combat zone.

H.M. Government has been able to negotiate a 20% discount on one-way trips to Japan with Virgin Airlines and you are strongly advised to take advantage of this offer (Ryanair might do a nice little £39.99 one-way trip).

Because of cutbacks in Government expenditure in recent years, it will be necessary for you to provide yourself with the following equipment as soon as possible:

Tins of Spam*
Combat trousers (preferably khaki ? but no disco camouflage)*
False moustaches*
Incontinence pads*
Gas mask (or canary)*
Map of the combat zone (O.S. 1:2800 leisure map of Korea is suitable)*
Travel Scrabble (for long hours sitting behind the hangar while US forces hit schools and hospitals with "smart" bombs*
Sun Cream*
All current medications* (for those with multiple conditions, a dedicated Hercules aircraft will be commissioned to transport all your drugs, medicines, creams, mobility aids and therapy equipment ....and should arrive within two months of your arrival in theatre).

If you are in a position to afford it, we would like you to join our scheme to adopt a Fighter Jet (The MOD are currently offering a great deal on ex registered Lightnings and Phantoms) this offer is only available whilst stocks last.

We should like to reassure you that in the unlikely event of anything going wrong, you will receive a free burial in the graveyard of your choice, and your next of kin will be entitled to the new War pension of £3.75 per calendar month, index-linked but subject to means testing, and fully repayable should our side eventually lose.
There will be little time for formal military refresher training before your departure and so we advise that you should hire DVDs of the following films and try to pick up as many tips as you can whilst you watch these films:

The Guns of Navarone*
Blazing Saddles*
The Battle of Britain*
Kelly's Heroes*
A Bridge Too Far*
The Longest Day*
Apocalypse Now*

GOOD LUCK

Keith at T, Many thanks for your very amusing contribution to this thread.....what a shame it had absolutely f.a. to do with 'Shi Painting' (or origami, if it comes to that).:)..still, never mind Ay ? Did you know that Acker Bilk came from Pensford in Somerset ?:confused:

.....Roger

P.S. I shouldn't worry too much about getting a call-up, mate...I'm sure you've already done your bit.

...And Jimmy Shand was a frequent visitor to Whitley Bay,stayed with a friends Aunt, and Brian passed him in the Rex and didn't recognise him. Cheers JWS...PS. I've still got my registration card for National Service from 1955 saying I am excempt so I"m ok. You can have my own hand made kit bag bag made with best quality duck canvas JS.

#14... Watched the 2013 movie on TVs last night " Olympus has Fallen" this movie as many other decries North Korea and emphasises all the bad in this so called rogue nation. The movies world has produced many films involving the adversary's as Russian Chinese and North Korea. I wonder if these countries get their physcologists to do an outline of the american people and their thoughts on animosity on. I also wonder if the leaders also watch and believe such fantasys. People can be brainwashed and not even know it. Other nations take loss of. Face as very serious and probably more harm than good is being displayed by siting them as Villians all the time, they also can believe such movies as aggressive. There is no such thing as good and bad men dying they all suffer the same pain and anguish, so to character a person of whatever nationality as the only good Indian is a dead Indian is both stupid and self non productive, just going backwards. JWS.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Roger Dyer

Hi Keith,

When I first saw the title of your thread, 'Shi Painting', I thought blimey! Keith's found himself a new oriental hobby ! (think origami or bonsai :)). Anyway, just thought you might like to know that at present, here in Oz, 4 litres of antifoul (for fibreglass boats) costs anything from $250 upwards (clearly, robbery is no longer an offence in the Antipodes).:eek:

...Roger

---

Roger mate be thankfull, without robbery of some kind many here would not have had their forbears arriving.
A little bit of robbery keeps the nations history alive.

Hi Roger, sorry about the misleading title to the post, fortunately its not often i miss a P these days, just rather frequent dash to the small room, kt

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Keith Tindell

Hi Roger, sorry about the misleading title to the post, fortunately its not often i miss a P these days, just rather frequent dash to the small room, kt

---

Brilliant riposte !.... I hope you draw some comfort in knowing you're not alone in that regard, mate !:)

...Roger