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Thread: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

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    Default Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    There are 2 sides :
    One out on the field and one in, each player that is in the in side that’s in goes out and when he’s out he comes in and the next player goes in until he’s out.
    When they are all out on the side that out comes in and the side that’s been in goes out and tries to get those coming in out.
    Sometimes you get players still in and not out.
    When both sides have been in and out including the not outs.thats the end of the game.
    HOWZAT


    JS
    R575129

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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    And when we come down there next John, we hope !! to show you how its played,, lol
    R689823

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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.


    Subject: JEWISH POKER CLUB>>
    Six retired Jewish mates were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Meyer loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing, but standing up.>>

    At the end of the game, Finklestein looks around and asks, "So, who's gonna tell his wife?" >>
    They cut the cards. Goldberg picks the low card and has to carry the news. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't make a bad situation any worse. >>

    "Discreet? I'm the most discreet person you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me. Goldberg goes over to the Meyer's condo and knocks on the door. The wife answers through the door and asks what he wants? >>

    Goldberg declares: "Your husband just lost $500 in a poker game and is afraid to come home.” >>
    "Tell him to drop dead!" yells the wife. >>

    "I'll go tell him," says Goldberg.

    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    #2 Howzat ? JS
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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    An old lady handed her bank card to the teller and said I would like to withdraw $10 . The teller told her for withdrawals less than $100 please use the ATM. The old lady wanted. To know why? The teller returned her card and said those are the rules, please leave if there is no further matter as the queue is building up behind you.
    The old lady remained silent for a few seconds and then handed her card back to the teller and said please help me withdraw all the money I have. The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head and leaned down and respectfully said you have$300,000 in your account and the bank doesn’t have that amount of cash currently , could you make an appointment and come back tomorrow ? The old lady asked how much she could withdraw immediately . The teller told her any amount up to $3000. Well please let me have $3000 now she said. The teller very kindly handed her $3000 .
    The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2990 back into her account.

    The moral of this story is....Don’t be difficult with old people , they’ve spent a lifetime learning their skills.
    JS
    Last edited by j.sabourn; 1st December 2022 at 04:44 AM.
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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    I was at the ATM the other day and an old lady said to me can you check my balance for me.
    So I gave here a push and she fell over, obviously very bad balance.
    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    That is SO good. Thank you.Keith.
    Keith Adams
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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    WE have another tornado bowler just waiting, tell them to aske the future King for a loan of some armour.
    Des
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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    Keith.
    I remember when they used to play proper cricket, when I was on my second trip we were stuck in Melbourne for weeks in a strike, I volunteered for Night Watchman, where for most of the night I pulled the Gangway up and slept on the messroom table. Went to the Test match for five days, must have been cheap to get in, can't remember the price. saw some of the greats of the game. that was in early 1950
    Des
    Last edited by Des Taff Jenkins; 2nd January 2023 at 12:06 AM.
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    Default Re: Cricket as explained to a Foreign Visitor.

    Can also remember when you had to be born and bred in Yorkshire to play for them also Des. Today International sport has lost most of its attractions for me when one sees the mixtures playing under the colours of other countries . Sport today is not true sport it is more in line with the. Roman Amphitheatres to appease the charlatans and the book makers runners. Cheers JS
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