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Thread: ME! A whinging Pom, Nahhh!

  1. #1
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    Aug 2008
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    Default ME! A whinging Pom, Nahhh!

    A Diary of an Englishman moving to Perth.
    Aug.31st. Just transferred with work to our new home in Perth!!
    Now this is a city that knows how to live !! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings . What a place! I watched the sunset from a deckchair on the veranda . It was beautiful. I've finally found my home . I love it here.
    Sept. 13th. Really heating up . Got to 35 today. Not a problem. Live in air-conditioned home , drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun worshiper.
    Sept. 30th. Had the backyard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks . What a breeze to maintain . No more mowing lawns for me. Another scorcher today . but I love it here.
    Oct. 10th. The temperature hasnt been below 30 all week . How do people get used to this type of heat ? At least today its kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat is taking longer than expected.
    Oct. 15th. Fell asleep by the pool . Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed 3 days work. What a dumb thing to do . I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the old Sun in a climate like this.
    Oct. 20th. I missed kitty ( our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got to the hot car for lunch , kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $3000 leather upholstery . I told the kids she had run away. The car now smells like Wiskettes and cat sh-t. I learned my lesson though no more pets in the heat.
    Oct. 25th. The wind sucks . It feels like a bloody giant hair blower !! and its as hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the blink and the A/C repairman charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needed to order parts .
    Oct.30th. Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody $450,000 house and we cant even go inside. Why did I ever come here ?.
    Nov.4th. Finally got the old air- conditioner working cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 25, but this bloody humidity makes the house feel like its 30.
    Stupid repairman . I hate this stupid place.
    Nov.8th. If another wise ass cracks " hot enough for you today ?", I'm going to strangle him. Bloody Heat!!!
    by the time I get to work the cars radiator was boiling over , my clothes soaking wet, and I smell like a baked cat!!
    Nov.9th Tried to run some messages after work. Wore shorts , and sat on the black leather seats in the old car. I thought my ass was on fire . I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and ass . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ass, and baked cat.
    Nov 10th. The weather report might as well be a bloody recording . Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. Its been too hot to do anything for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn place ? Water rationing will be next , so my $2000 worth of palms just might dry up and blow into the pool. Even the Palms cant live in this heat.
    Nov.14th. Welcome to Hell!! Temperature got to 38 today . Now the air-conditioner gone in my car . The repairman came to fix it and said , Hot enough for you today? My wife had to spend the $2,500 house payment to bail my ass out of jail for assaulting the repairman.
    Bloody Perth.
    What kind of sick demented idiot would want to live here ?
    December 1st. WHAT????This is the first day of Summer . You are Effing kidding me !!!!!!!

    JS This is someone elses Diary , not mine.
    Last edited by j.sabourn; 20th September 2021 at 12:13 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Sunbury Victoria Australia
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    Default Re: ME! A whinging Pom, Nahhh!

    Oh yes, some I know went to live in Brisy, told me they spend up to three months indoors with the air conditioner going full blast, the humidity is killing them.
    But still a wonderful country, where else could you get four seasons in one day apart from Melbourne, some time sin one hour.
    Then when the north win blows and you go from a balmy 25 up to 40 in about 10 minutes.
    But you can go to the Painted desert just outside of Coober Pedey in summer and sit in 50 degrees with a cold one, nothing like it.
    Or maybe Marble Bar when it gets to may be a warm 52 on occasions.

    Some years ago the people of Darwin were looking for long sleeved jumpers when the temp dropped to as low as 22 degrees, poor buggers.
    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

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