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Thread: Pigs

  1. #1
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    Default Pigs

    A farmer out Condoblin way has five female pigs, while his mate from just outside Parks has five male pigs, in these tough times they decide to mate the pigs and split everything 50/50. The obvious thing to do is meet halfway, in a field just west of Bogan Gate, and on that morning the farmer with the female pigs gets up at 5am, loads the pigs into the back of the family station wagon, the only vehicle he has, and drives the 50 kilometers to the fields. As the pigs mate, he asks the other farmer, "How will I know when they are pregnant?"
    " If they are lying in the grass tomorrow morning," his mate replies, "they are pregnant, if they are in the mud they are not, and you will have to do the whole things over again."
    The next morning the pigs are rolling in the mud, so after hosing them off he loads them into the family station wagon again, and they try again. This goes on for a week, and by Sunday the Condoblin farmer is to tired to get out of bed.
    "Darling " he yells, "Please look outside and tell me whether the pigs are in the grass or the mud.
    "Neither," his wife yells back. "They're in the station wagon, and one of them is honking the horn.
    R510868
    Lest We Forget

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    Default Re: Pigs

    Senior Site Moderator-Member and Friend of this Website

    R697530

  3. #3
    Lewis McColl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pigs

    A few years ago we went to a country fair . There was a section exhibiting rare breeds, Hens, Sheep, Pigs, Horses like Suffolk Punch. I love looking at horses especially the larger breeds.
    As with all these fairs you can sample and buy produce etc!!
    No wonder there are rare breeds , at this show a lot of them had been vacuum packed.

    Rare breed British farm animals are in danger of dying out unless diners start to request them in restaurants, a report has warned. Um!!! but I get it lol.

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    Default Re: Pigs

    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis McColl View Post
    A few years ago we went to a country fair .

    Rare breed British farm animals are in danger of dying out unless diners start to request them in restaurants, a report has warned. Um!!! but I get it lol.
    I buy British meat of all types, earlier this year I bought rare breed beef rib and paid double what I normally pay, it was a waste of money, no better tasting than my usual source and much chewier, not fun when you only got a few stumps left.
    Last edited by Doc Vernon; 24th May 2021 at 07:51 PM.

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  6. #5
    Keith at Tregenna's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pigs

    A woman walks into a bar with a duck under her arm. Barman
    says "Worry we don't serve pigs in here," The lady says "Its not
    a pig its a duck" The barman says "I am talking to the duck."

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    Default Re: Pigs

    Few years ago a guy here was looking for a gun license and asked the local cop where to get it.

    Why do you want it he asked.

    To go Pig shooting

    Where asked the cop.

    Spring Street came the reply.

    Spring Street is where the local state parliament is.
    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

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