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Thread: Maxine

  1. #1
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    Default Maxine

    Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not try to blame others.

    HOWEVER, upon reflection, we would like to point out that it was NOT senior citizens who took:

    The melody out of music,

    The pride out of appearance,

    The courtesy out of driving,

    The romance out of love,

    The commitment out of marriage,

    The responsibility out of parenthood,

    The togetherness out of the family,

    The learning out of education,

    The service out of patriotism,

    The Golden Rule from rulers,

    The nativity scene out of cities,

    The civility out of behaviour,

    The refinement out of language,

    The dedication out of employment,

    The prudence out of spending,

    The ambition out of achievement or

    God out of government and school.


    And we certainly are NOT the ones who
    eliminated patience and tolerance from
    personal relationships and interactions with
    others!
    And, we DO understand the meaning of patriotism, and remember those who have fought and died for our country.

    mailbox:///C:/Users/birem/AppData/Roaming/Thunderbird/Profiles/l4vngrj9.default-release/Mail/pop3.ozemail.com.au/Inbox?number=4104&part=1.2.3&filename=image003.gif Just look at the Seniors with tears in their eyes and pride in their hearts, as they stand at attention as the Flag passes by in a parade!

    YES, I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN!

    I'm the life of the party....Even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
    I'm very good at opening childproof caps.....
    With a hammer.

    I'm awake many hours before
    my body allows me to get up.

    mailbox:///C:/Users/birem/AppData/Roaming/Thunderbird/Profiles/l4vngrj9.default-release/Mail/pop3.ozemail.com.au/Inbox?number=4104&part=1.2.4&filename=image004.gif I'm smiling all the time,
    because I can't hear a thing you're saying.

    I'm sure everything I can't find is
    in a safe secure place, somewhere.

    I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy,
    and that's just my left leg.
    I'm beginning to realize that aging is not for wimps.


    Yes, I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I am having the time of my life! Now if I could only remember who sent this to me, I wouldn't send it back to them.
    Or, maybe I should send it to all my friends anyway.
    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Maxine

    An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.

    He finds his way to a barstool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

    After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'

    The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

    In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,

    'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

    1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

    2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.

    3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

    4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.

    5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

    Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'

    The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'
    Happy daze John in Oz.

    Life is too short to blend in.

    John Strange R737787
    World Traveller

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Maxine

    Like them both John. Well done.
    Graham R774640

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