Old age and depression

[Braid Anderson]

From my unpublished book 'Flag McAndrew in Indonesia'

Lingham went with him to the doctor's surgery for Flag's insurance medical. The doctor was a stout, bald Chinese with a round face and ready smile. He poked and prodded, looked and listened; put the ECG wires all over Flag's chest, and asked a lot of questions.
Flag began to wonder if maybe he had a rare disease he had been unaware of. Could the doctor cure it? Was it even curable? He lay there wired up, thinking of the cures for various diseases. Women cure romance; two taken on retiring could even cure insomnia. Cleopatra cured Anthony, Josephine her Napoleon; Eve cured Adam (and the rest of us mere men), and Delilah sure as hell cured Samson. Death cures ambition - and most other things. The same way cancer cures smoking, and Madame Guillotine cures headaches.
What cures daydreaming - nightmares? What's the cure for cynicism, eternal life? No, that would more likely cure optimism.
What's the Secret of Life? God knows - but He's not telling anyone, because it's His secret, and if He told everybody it wouldn't be a secret any more, would it?
Wake up Flag. The doctor says you're okay, you'll live. In fact, you're disgustingly healthy. But maybe somebody can cure that? What was it Einstein said? If you go forwards fast enough for long enough, you finish up backwards and inside out - or something. Called it his Theory of Relativity. But the Italian immigrants got there before he did. They had all the relativity living together in one big house.
You're going round the twist, Flag McAndrew. I suppose if you go round the twist fast enough you get dizzy, and that makes you go round the twist; and get dizzier; and go round the twist. Now there's the real theory of relativity - or is that perpetual motion? But if it's motion, it can only be in motion relative to something else - gotcha!
"Thanks doctor," said Flag. "Don't forget to keep taking your pills." The doctor looked at him with open mouth.
"How did you know.....?"
"Just a lucky guess," said Flag. "But I'd get an ECG myself if I were you - and make it soon, you look terrible."
Flag didn't particularly like or trust doctors. One old fellow in Scotland had told him to give up smoking, while coughing through his own tobacco smoke. It was too late for himself he said, but if Flag didn't stop, he'd be in a wheelchair before he was thirty.
He now fully intended to smoke, drink and screw himself to death before he reached the age of a hundred and twenty. Mind you, if he died a little before that, he wouldn't really complain. It's a bit hard to complain once you're dead anyway. And who would he complain to - God?
Ah, now, about that Secret of Life, God.......

[Captain Kong]

I cannot envisage a world without me.
and I would just hate to be a blank space in someone's fading memory, so I think I would be better staying here.
Brian

[Keith at Tregenna]

SAW THIS: Thought it appropriate ?

K.

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[Captain Kong]

Another one down today, Poor old Aunty Florence, 94, not a bad innings, but not long enough for me.
One of five sisters all lived well into their 90s, two hit 99 and 6 months. They all fell at the last fence. I told the last aunt that I would have to crack the 100.
So I am working on it.
Another funeral on Monday, the Fifth this year.
Cheers
Brian

[Red Lead Ted]

I like this quote,

[Keith at Tregenna]

Did you know ? mad.jpg

[Lou Barron]

In a couple of weeks i will be 89 years old but i dont think i suffer from old age or depression i always look on the positive side and think how lucky i have been to be able to get this far .

[Charlie Hannah]

get yourself a dog you will soon be back to running!woof Woof.

[John Pruden]

always look forward to tomorrow but enjoy today? jp

[happy daze john in oz]

I am of the opinion that mental fitness is the key to physical fitness. If you can keep your mind fit your body will follow, exercise and a sensible diet are also very important, but the most important thing is a positive attitude, without that you are cactus.