Initiation ceremonies

[Jim Brady]

I hope I can get this right as Iv'e had about one over the 8.As it is Fathers Day tomorrow my son plays golf on sunday so he decided to give me a good day out today.Beeing a greedy get I asked to be dropped off at my local for one for the road.Anyway there was a guy there (now about 69) he did his first trip with me a galley boy on the Crystal Sapphire.I was messman and they were all in my messroom having breakfast on St.Patricks Day when I declared"Has anybody ever heard that story that on St.Patricks a white hand appears on the porthole not everybody see's it but those that do die" All hands passed it of but the galley boy insisted to knowing the full story.I went down to the fridge and got the wire off the egg crate and made a shape in the form of a hand,I lashed this to a brush pole,went into the rag bag and made a big white hand.
We were having a few beers and the guitar going,I positioned the galley boy opposite the port hole I told the boys if a white hand appears they did'nt see it.As it happens the port holes were on the skin of the ship so I made an excuse to go to the toilet,I leaned out my port hole and placed the hand on the port hole where the boys were.The galley boy was screaming out "Look at that hand" all hands said they could'nt see it,I came back into the cabin the galley boy said "Jim I've just seen a hand on the port hole" dont be stupid I saidit's just one of those old sea tales.I caught him in a few diferent places.We all turned in and there was a knock on my door,the kid came in and he was crying he was still seeing the hand when in fact it was in my wardrobe( that sounds posh from locker but it was a good ship).Jim can I sleep on your daybed I'm scared,look son if I get caught letting you sleep in here I'm in trouble.Eventually I jumped out of my bunk grabbed the hand out of my locker and threw it threw the port hole and told the kid to go and get his head down.
It's funny you know if I go into this pub and try and raise the subject this guy is not amused,you would think he would have a laugh and say Jim got me on that one.
Regards.
Jim.B.

[Paul Steel]

You might like this.

I’ll never forget my first Electricity Bill aboard m.v.Derbyshire-first trip cadet.
(Must explain that because there were 4 of us Deck cadets,my cabin was in one of the spare Eng.Cadets cabins)

I got a bit of a shock() at first…how could I afford it on £30 a month,andstill go ashore in Hamburg!
Note the pre-decimal 'proper' money.
It was even counter-initialled by the C/O .


Happy Days!
Gulliver
　
　

That reminds me of the time we did that to two fiirst time at sea engineering cadets, with me having only just finished my cadetship.

I used to help them with their correspondence course as I had only just completed mine.

Frank wanted to learn everything, the other cadet was a bit of a knowitall. When they had their electricity bills, the other cadet was dismissive of the bill. He asked me how much mine was, and as we had been primed by the Lecky I explained it was calculated on how many units you used and your rank, so I would pay a little more than they would for the same units as I earned a little more.

Still not convinced the cadet was saying 'bull**it'.

Now in my cabin I hardly ever had the main light on, just the bed and sink lights, nicer atmosphere/ambience. :-)

So the conversation went like this.

Me: You know when you come down to my cabin for the correspondence course?
Cadet: Yes
Me: Did you not notice that I never have the main light on, just the small strip lights over the bed and sink?
Cadet: Yes
Me: Well that is why, I try and save on my electricity bill.
Cadet thinks for a minute, is this plausible?

Cadet: Bloody hell, I've left all the lights on in the cabin

and disappeared out of the bar. Hook, Line and Sinker.

[Louis the Amigo]

Hi shipmates, how come no one has said anything about crossing the line? or the bosuns' can of stripe paint and on some ships the elbow grease? and the pink red lead for the bridge?

[John Arton]

Whilst exactly an initiation ceremony, whilst a very Junior Officer having to conducy bridge tours etc. some of the questions we were asked by the passengers were often beyond belief and our replies they all believed, after all we were all very responsible officers, werent we.
Asked by one passenger "whats the name of those birds (sh*te hawks) following down the Mersey one crossing, the reply was , "see the one with the black mark on its right wing, thats harles, the one with one leg longer than the other is Mary" etc. etc. Passenger says how do you know yhat, I reply the same birds follow us every trip, passenger goes away believing this young Officer is telling the absolute truth and is next seen pointing out a sh*te hawk to another passenger and saying "that one is called charles and follows the ship everywhere".
Another classic regarding passenger was told to me by one of the Rotterdam pilots when he was taking my ship in. He had served as Mate on one of the smaller cruise boats, that catered for, lets say, the more refined (expensive) passengers. On one of the cruises they were visiting London and the ship was small enough to actually berth in the Pool of London but had to anchor off Southend to wait for tide and Thames Barrier. Apparentley he was quietly minding his own business having a nice quiet anchor watch when an irate American passenger burst onto the bridge (it was that sort of cruise line that allowed passenger to go virtually anywhere on the ship at any time) demanding to know why the ship was at anchor. When told they were waiting for the tide he refused to believe the Mate and started getting very agitated and claimed that he knew something was seriously wrong and had the ship been hijacked ot halted because there was a bomb on board. Whatever my pilot friend said to him he refused to believe getting more agitated anfd coming out with more outlandish reasons for the reason why the ship was anchored. In the end, to shut him up the Mate said he would tell him the truth, that being that as all the electric plugs and supply was different in the UK to anywhere else, that at this very instant there were divers down changing the plug and socket on the long electric cable down which the ships electricity came in order that they could get there electricity in the UK. Believe it or not, the passenger actually believed him and went away to relay this info to all his buddies.
Passengers eh!!!!, hardest cargo you will ever carry.

rgds
Capt. John Arton (retd)