PDA

View Full Version : Flied Lice



Victoria Moss
26th May 2020, 04:58 AM
Some cowboys come into a Chinese take away and ask the owner what's the special of the day.
The owner says flied lice very good. The cowboys roar laughing and keep coming into the store asking the owner what's the special to which he replies flied lice.
After a while the owner decides he should get a better grip on his English and does a course.
Later these same cowboys come into his shop and ask again what's the special?
The owner now replies I have a surfeit of fried rice...you plick!!

Keith at Tregenna
26th May 2020, 05:06 AM
"911 "

"Hello my wife was cookin dinner and she fell" says the husband

"What's the emergency?"

The huband replies " how do I know when the rice is ready?"

Keith at Tregenna
27th May 2020, 04:42 AM
Four men are sitting on a high construction site...
A Chinese man, a Mexican man, an English man, and an Australian.
They have just sat down at the top of the construction site for lunch.

Upon opening his lunch box the Chinese man exclaims,

"Fried Rice, again! If I have Fried Rice again tomorrow, I'm going to jump."

The Mexican opens up his lunch box and exclaims,

"Enchiladas, again! If I have Enchiladas again tomorrow, I'm going to jump."

The English man opens up his lunch box and exclaims,

"Corned Beef sandwich, again! If I have a Corned Beef Sandwich again tomorrow, I'm going to jump."

The Australian opens up his lunch box and exclaims,

"Vegemite sandwich, again! If I have a Vegemite sandwich again tomorrow, I'm going to jump."

They all look at one another and nod in agreement.

The next day, they're sitting at the top of the construction site, about to have lunch. One by one they open up their lunch boxes.

"Fried Rice, again!" Says the Chinese man before jumping to his death.

"Enchiladas, again!" Says the Mexican before jumping to his death.

"Corned Beef, again!" Says the English man before jumping to his death as well.

lastly, the Australian says, "Vegemite, again!" and follows the others.

At the funeral for these men, their wives are standing next to one another, crying.

The Chinese man's wife says, "If only I had've known my husband didn't want Fried Rice, I could've prevented his death."

The Mexican's wife says, "If only I had've known my husband didn't want Enchiladas, I could've prevented his death."

The English man's wife says, "If only I had've known my husband didn't want Corned Beef sandwiches, I could've prevented his death."

Silence follows, and the three wives turn to the Australian's, to which she says,

"What are you looking at me for? The ba?tard made his own lunch."